Reg and green flags are fairly well-known. Red flags are glaring danger signs warning about significant unhealthy issues or behaviours that you should not ignore. Green flags are signs indicating that all is well and it’s safe to go forward. Yellow flags fall somewhere in the middle. They are not an immediate dealbreaker or major issue but they indicate a behaviour, tendency, pattern or trait that could later turn into a larger issue. At the very least, they are things that are worth a discussion or further exploration. While red flags are glaring, yellow flags are subtle and easy to miss or overlook. Here are some things that could easily turn into serious problems.
They have never had a long-term relationship before
There’s a common view that a lack of long-term relationships indicates that they are not a great partner, or are commitment-shy or have unrealistic standards. While there are many other reasons why a person may not have had a long-term relationship, there’s a conversation to be had here. Conversely, if they have a long list of failed relationships, it could also be a problem. Is there a pattern that points to concerning behaviour?
They want to spend all their time with you
While it’s normal and even endearing to want to spend time with a new love interest, it could signal an unhealthy dynamic. It can even mask love bombing which is when abusers engage in excessive displays of affection and attention in the beginning.
They are indecisive
While being uncertain is normal and no one wants a rigid partner, someone who’s always indecisive is likely to end up being a problem. You should be open to your partner’s input, but everyone in the relationship should know what they want and be able to make decisions without being paralyzed by indecision. Having to make all the decisions in a relationship will later be too burdensome.
They have no hobbies or interests
Hobbies help make a person well-rounded while giving them an opportunity to engage in an activity simply because they enjoy it and it brings them joy. Having no hobbies or interests could mean they are, withdrawn, isolated or even dealing with depression or anxiety.
They have no other friends
Not having any friends is a potential yellow flag. Friendships indicate an ability to nurture healthy relationships and their total absence may be a cause of concern.
They have a lot of debt
Debt is normal, what you should be concerned about is the cause of the debt. Do they have concerning spending habits or problematic behaviours like gambling? Do they have a plan to take care of it? Partnering up with someone has a financial side to it that you need to take into account.
They are not close to or are too close to their parents or family
One’s relationship with their family affects the rest of their relationships. If they have no relationship with their family, it’s best to dig deeper to find out why which is not to discount the fact that there may be legitimate reasons. If they are too close to their family, it could also be a problem, for example, if they run every single decision by their family members regardless of how small it may be.
They have a relationship with their ex
Having a relationship with your ex is not an outright issue, but it’s important to understand the current nature of their relationship.
They have a hard time telling you how they feel
Relationships rise and fall based on communication. If your partner has a difficult time communicating how they feel, that could later on become a problem. It may be a sign that they are emotionally unavailable or may require more time to build trust in order to be vulnerable. Whatever, the reason, you need to talk about it in order to understand it and maybe find solutions to fix it.
If you notice any of these yellow flags, consider talking and addressing them before you get to a point of no return.
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