Joe was excited about introducing me to his parents. We had been dating for two years. He was almost perfect. With him, I didn’t have to explain myself or get defensive over everything because he understood me.
We met through a mutual friend. I worked in finance, and he worked in the IT department with our mutual friend. We were both ambitious and found ways to help each other.
I knew I liked him after our first date. We went for a movie and decided to eat at a restaurant in the area. It turned out the restaurant had gardens where people could take a stroll.
We hadn’t even realized it was getting dark until the fairy lights in the garden went on. The ambience was ripe for romance. Under that light, the witty, good-smelling man looked even more handsome.
I couldn’t wait to tell my friend about it.
“Girl, I think I am in trouble,” I texted.
“Why? How did the date go?” She asked.
“It was like we had known each other for years. I really like him,” I replied.
“Joe is one of the good ones. I would be delighted if you guys ended up together,” she said.
Two years after that, he asked me to meet his parents. We were ready to get married, and we were both excited about the meeting. The day finally came, and we made sure to get to his parents’ house by midday.
His siblings were also home. We enjoyed lunch and then I went to help the mum with the dishes. We talked a bit as the mum enquired about me. Joe’s sister chimed in the conversation as she prepared four o’clock snacks and tea.
We then went back to the living room for the four o’clock tea. Joe’s dad was funny, and everyone laughed at his stories. Then he turned to me.
“My daughter, Joe, has told me a lot of good things about you. I’m sure Mum has welcomed you to our home, but I also want to welcome you.”
“Thank you. I am delighted to be here,” I replied.
“I hear you work in finance. All about the money, yes?” He teased.
“Yes, I do. I am also pursuing my Master’s in the same. Hopefully, I will be done by the end of the year,” I responded.
“You found a smart one here, my son,” he told Joe. We all laughed.
We left a bit later and talked of future gatherings. I thought it went well. About two weeks later. Joe went home alone. When he came back, something was different.
Out of nowhere, he started arguing with me over things we had previously agreed on. He took a contrary position on my suggestions. We fought so much for weeks that I dreaded talking to him. The conflicts took a toll on us, and we ended things.
I couldn’t figure out what had happened. Weeks later, while speaking to a mutual friend, she mentioned something.
“What happened to Joe?” She asked.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“He’s changed so much. There was a discussion in the office about relationships and marriage, and he had a weird take. That wasn’t the Joe I knew,” she responded.
“What did he say?”I asked.
“He was talking about how men shouldn’t marry smart women because that’s a recipe for a failed marriage. Oh, and he said that was the advice he got from his parents,” she responded.
“Oh really? You have actually solved a puzzle for me. It was like one minute we were good, but then everything changed out of nowhere. I could hardly understand what had happened. I seemed to annoy him every time I opened my mouth,” I told her in tears.
“He said he realized you weren’t the perfect for him when I asked why you broke up. You couldn’t be ‘led,’ was how he put it,” she told me.
“We moved from making decisions together after discussing to him trying to impose ideas on me. At times, I didn’t even think he believed in them.”
“I’m so sorry. You don’t need to act small or dim your light with the right person. He’ll love you and appreciate you for who you are. Leave Joe in the past. It’s his loss,” said the friend.
Shocking as it was to understand why the relationship failed, I got the closure I needed.
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