They say the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else. This may work for most people but for me, I’m more of an old-school kind of girl. I believe in healing my wounds before getting into a new relationship or even getting back on the dating scene. It’s very hard for me to open up to someone else when I haven’t completely moved on from a past relationship. Nonetheless, I decided to put this theory to the test since my friend suggested it. She encouraged me to get drunk and have a one-night stand.
“You’ve been so down lately. Just go get drunk and have some fun.” She said.
In theory, it sounded fun but I knew I just couldn’t have a one-night stand. I could barely go on a date after a breakup. She had a few options for me to choose from but none of them were even my type.
“They aren’t my type,” I said, dismissing her choices.
“That’s the point. You don’t want to go on a date with someone who reminds you of your ex.”
She had a point but I still couldn’t see myself spending even a few hours with any of them. However, I promised her that I would consider her suggestion and try to go on a date. One of my male friends was also having relationship problems around the same time and I learnt that he broke up with his girlfriend. I thought it was a good idea if we went on a date since both of us were going through relationship issues. Besides, we always got along and I knew things wouldn’t be awkward with him.
I heard about the breakup.” I said to him over the phone.
“Yeah. Love sucks.”
“I know.”
We ended up bonding over our mutual heartbreak and we planned to meet over the weekend so we could talk in person. I was excited about the date since my friend assured me it was the best way to get over my ex. I also looked forward to spending time with Will. However, my excitement soon turned to worry. A part of me was still hesitant since I wasn’t over my ex and I felt like I was using my friend.
“Be honest with him. He’ll understand.” My friend advised me.
“I’m kinda nervous. I haven’t gone on a date with a new person in years.”
“Get drunk. It will kill the nerves.”
“You’re right. I’m so glad I have you to help me through this.”
“Whatever you need. If you need me, just call me.”
Armed with my friend’s expert knowledge and encouragement, I felt a bit confident about the date. I started preparing and made sure that I was dressed to kill so Will would find me attractive.
The fateful day came faster than expected but I was well prepared for it.
“Today is the day I get laid,” I told myself as I did my makeup.
I kept checking myself in the mirror to make sure that I looked perfect from my head down to my toes. When I finally felt good about how I looked, I headed out to meet with Will who had been waiting for me for almost an hour.
“I’m so sorry I’m late. I got an emergency Zoom call from my boss.”
“That’s fine. You look so good.” He said as he took a second look.
“Thanks. You look good too.”
He did look good but I couldn’t help but notice the similarities between him and my ex. The more I looked at him, the more he reminded me of my ex. This made me nervous and my heart started racing.
“I need to use the bathroom,” I said and got up hurriedly before he could say anything.
“Babe, he looks just like my ex,” I said to my friend over the phone.
“Stop. You’re just obsessed with your ex. Try and forget about him just for tonight.”
After calming my nerves, I went back and tried to keep my mind off my ex. It was hard and there were moments I would sit in silence and stare out in the distance as Will was talking. I ordered another cocktail and two shots so I could loosen up just as my friend had advised me. However, I still couldn’t hide my emotions despite being drunk. If anything, being drunk made things worse.
“Are you okay?” He asked.
That question made me spiral and I burst out into tears. It was so unexpected and chaotic that Will was genuinely scared that something bad had happened.
“I just miss him,” I said while sobbing.
“Who?”
“My ex,” I said in a low sad tone.
He was quiet and I thought I had ruined the date. Then, when I looked up, I noticed tears rolling down his face.
“I miss my ex too.” He said.
We both sobbed for a good 15 minutes before realizing that we were not only on a date but also in a public space and people were looking at us.
I wiped my tears and composed myself and he did the same. Things were so awkward just as I expected. I tried to change the topic a few times but nothing worked. We finally accepted the fact that both of us still hadn’t gotten over our past relationship and after a few drinks, we were laughing about it.
“I’ve never cried in public.” He said.
“I have but never on a date.”
He then suggested that we should call our exes and though I was drunk, I still realized that it was a bad idea. The rest of the date went surprisingly well. I realized that Will and I had a lot and I enjoyed his company.
As my friend advised, I got drunk and ended up going home with him. However, we couldn’t get past the awkwardness and nothing else happened. Though we didn’t hook up, the date helped me let out my emotions and eventually, I forgot about my ex.
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