My friends have told me stories about their crazy ex but I never thought I’d experience one mostly because I wasn’t attracted to drama queens. Sheila was exactly my type. She was well-educated, had a good job, her own place, and a group of equally good friends – or so I thought. She seemed to be the perfect girl and we had a great relationship for most of it. We’d get in a few fights but things were quickly resolved and we were back on good terms. For all the two years together, I never saw her violent or crazy side.
Her friends were pretty level-headed too with the exception of one who we didn’t get along from day one. Sheila’s best friend, Maggie, had a thing against me. Whenever we hang out as a group, she refused to acknowledge me even though I was the one paying for their meals.
“Babe, what’s up with Maggie? Why doesn’t she talk to me at all?”
“Oh, I don’t know. She’s never been this way with any of my boyfriends. I’ll talk to her, babe.” Sheila answered.
Though this sounded assuring, the hostility continued throughout our relationship. I even had to leave the house any time she’d come over to visit my girlfriend. Our relationship came to an end after two years of dating. It seemed to have ended on good terms and we still kept in touch and hang out once in a while after the breakup. Our friendship was just as good as our relationship. I was there for her as she studied for her Master’s exams and eventually graduated.
“So, where did you meet?” her father asked during her graduation dinner.
“At the university, dad.” She interjected.
Of course, she was lying. Sheila and I met at a house party one of my friends had hosted. She then went on to make up this elaborate story of how we became friends. I simply stared at her in disbelief at how she kept a straight face while lying to her family. It still hadn’t hit me that she was displaying some crazy tendencies.
“And what are you doing for work?” her father asked me.
“He’s a political analyst.”
I wasn’t. I was an IT assistant at the Office Of The Governor. However, I played along with her lies as I didn’t want to embarrass her on her big day. She also seemed to be having a blast with all the attention on her and I didn’t want to burst her bubble.
After dinner, I drove her home and she invited me to her place. I wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to encourage her since she was visibly drunk. However, I had missed her and I wanted to spend some alone time with her. This was probably the worst decision I’ve ever made but I spent the night at her place that night. As I prepared to leave the next morning, Sheila kept suggesting things for us to do but I put them all off since I was actually needed at the office.
She let me leave half-heartedly then sent me a series of texts explaining how I was a bad person for breaking her heart twice. It still hadn’t hit me that she was turning into a crazy ex. I promised to take her for dinner that evening after leaving work which gave me a break from the endless texting. However, it didn’t take long for me to catch on to Sheila’s agenda. She was trying to bait me into dating her again.
“It will be different this time. I promise.” She explained.
“You still hang out with the same friends. They still hate me till today.”
“I’ll get new friends then.”
“We can give it another try but if I feel even the slightest mental exhaustion, I’m out.” I asserted.
It was exciting being in a relationship with her again. She was the perfect girlfriend, even better than the first time. I found myself choosing to spend more time with her than going to hang out with my friends and she did the same. Then, out of nowhere, Maggie came back in her life. She started calling her out for lunch and making random visits to her house. We ended up hanging out at my place more though it wasn’t as nice as Sheila’s place.
Just like the first time, Maggie managed to drive a wedge between us. Sheila started complaining about things that were out of my control like my finances, my car and my place. Since I knew that wasn’t changing any time soon, the nagging would only wear me out. I ended the relationship. However, this time it wasn’t very amicable.
Her entire friend group ganged up on me with Maggie leading the pack. They’d call me at least 5 times a day and any time I answered, they’d hang up. I had to change my number and deactivate my social media accounts for a month to get them to leave me alone.
Everything seemed to have cooled down and I had met another girl at work and we began dating during that month. As soon as I returned on social media and posted a picture of one of our date nights, Sheila sent me a DM reading:
“I heard you were dating again. That’s her? You know what, you never even deserved a girl like me. And if I ever see you anywhere, I’m beating the **** out of you.”
I showed my girlfriend the text in disbelief. I never thought Sheila, of all people, would be the crazy ex.
“It happens. That’s how some people react. I wouldn’t think too much into it.” she said.
I wouldn’t have either but I knew Sheila had some crazy friends who had turned her to a crazy ex and were probably telling her to do all sorts of things to me. The message stuck with me for a whole week. I walked around looking over my shoulder until I decided to get some legal help. One of my lawyer friends sent a letter to her letting her know that I would take legal action against her if she threatened me again. It seemed to work since I haven’t heard from her since then. My new relationship is in a good position and we’re planning on moving in together.
The singlehood series is a collection of real-life stories and opinions from different people. It looks at the current world of dating in Kenya and experiences that people have gone through. The views and opinions expressed here are those of the contributors and do not necessarily represent or reflect the views of Potentash.com.