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The Singlehood Series: He Dumped Me Because I Have Body Hair

Woman with body hair. Image from https://www.pinterest.com/pin/562105597242828099/

The Singlehood Series: He Dumped Me Because I Have Body Hair

His reaction made me feel so insecure.

Singlehood Series by Singlehood Series
27 July 2023
in The Singlehood Series
Reading Time: 5 mins read
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I used to get waxed every month but nowadays I embrace my body hair. Don’t get me wrong, I still shave every once in a while before it gets out of control but I stay as natural as possible for the most part. Additionally, my body hair isn’t that bad. I’ve never had an issue with it even when I used to get waxed every month. The only issue I used to have was that it grows really fast so even if I shave, it grows back in a week.

My change came after a horrible waxing experience. I usually went to the same beautician for more than a year. Her services were exceptionally good. However, it became difficult to go to her parlour after I moved out of Nairobi so I found a different beautician in my area. The new one wasn’t as good but many people had told me that she was the best around so I didn’t bother to look for another one.

“Imagine my new beautician burned me the last time I went for a wax,” I complained to my friend. “I think I need a new one.”

“The others are worse. You better just go to her.” My friend suggested.

It took me some time to get comfortable with letting a new person wax my private areas. She didn’t make the experience any more comfortable as she kept complaining that my hair was too long and that she would charge extra to trim it. I didn’t protest but I’ve never been charged to get trimmed. She also made faces when she was waxing which made me uncomfortable. After a few sessions, I decided to just let my hair grow until I could go for a session with my usual beautician.

It was uncomfortable at first since I was used to being as smooth as a Barbie doll. However, the natural look grew on me. I loved having body hair and it made me feel more confident in myself. I even started telling my friends to stop waxing.

“You need to get used to your body hair especially now that you’re growing older,” I advised them.

“My man would never let me grow my body hair. As soon as some small hair starts growing, he tells me to go and get a wax.”

“What will he do when you’re pregnant and can’t get waxed?”

“I don’t know. We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.”

At least I didn’t need a man’s approval to grow my natural hair nor did I think I would ever need it. However, I underestimated how petty men can be. I started dating again and reality hit me. I knew that most men preferred their women to shave or wax their body hair but I didn’t think it was that big of a deal, especially in this day and age.

The guy I met seemed pretty cool so I thought I had nothing to worry about. In fact, he insisted that he was a feminist and he liked that I didn’t wear makeup.

“You look beautiful, naturally.” He said after I sent him a selfie.

“Thank you. I’ve been trying to be as natural as possible.”

“That’s really good. I think you pull off the natural look really well.”

We had been talking for about a month and planned on meeting in person for the first time. Normally, I would shave my body hair when going on a date but I felt like he wouldn’t mind. After all, he said that he liked natural women. When we met, it was like I had met my soulmate. We had an instant connection and got along so well. The entire date went smoothly and he invited me to his place for drinks.

“Do you like wine?” He asked.

“Of course,” I answered.

“Great. I got a bottle of wine at home that I have been saving to share with someone special and I think you’re quite special.”

I chuckled and said, “I’d love to drink wine with you.”

We got in the Uber and headed to his place. His apartment was meticulously clean which I teased him about.

“It looks like no one ever sleeps here,” I said.

“I just like being clean.” He said.

He went to the kitchen and came back with a bottle of wine and two glasses. The night was going great, so far. We were having so much fun and getting drunk on wine. Then, he leaned in and kissed me. One thing led to another and we ended up in his bedroom.

However, things went completely south after that. He noticed that I had body hair after I got undressed and he completely panicked.

“What’s that?” He asked, pointing at my private area.

“It’s just hair. Relax.”

“Why didn’t you shave?”

“I told you I was all natural.”

“I thought you meant that you didn’t wear makeup, not that you didn’t shave. That’s disgusting.”

His reaction left me speechless. It had been about two months since I shaved and my body hair had grown quite a bit. However, I didn’t expect that kind of reaction. It was like he had seen something so vile. He continued complaining about my body hair which made me so insecure that I reached for my clothes and got dressed.

“You said that you like natural women.”

“Body hair is unacceptable. This is why you’re single. You should get rid of your body hair completely.”

I wouldn’t have thought that he would have an issue with my body hair. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have even agreed to go on a date with him. He made me feel like I was less of a woman because I had body hair and for a moment, I thought that I had made a mistake in choosing not to shave my body hair. However, I reminded myself that I was beautiful whether I had body hair or not and that I would get a man who would love me just the way I was.

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The singlehood series is a collection of real-life stories and opinions from different people. It looks at the current world of dating around the world and the experiences that people have gone through.

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