When I met Sarah, I was a broken woman. I was 4 months pregnant, unemployed and stuck in an abusive relationship. I used to go through mental, emotional and physical abuse every day to the point where I felt like my world had come to an end. What was supposed to be the happiest moment of my life turned out to be the worst. I had no one to turn to either since everyone believed that my ex was a saint. He would buy things for my family to make them like him. So I knew I could never convince them that James was a bad person. Then, I met Sarah and everything changed. She quickly became my best friend and someone I could turn to for support.
We actually met in an unexpected way. We usually have chama meetings with other mums in the apartment. Since I wasn’t a mum yet, I didn’t know whether I should attend the meetings. Then, one of the mums invited me to the meetings and that was where I met Sarah. She wasn’t part of the group. She didn’t even live in our building but was around to help her friend host us since her housekeeper had left. Of all the women at the meeting, I became friends with the one who didn’t even live near me. Still, I was so happy to finally make a friend who was also a mum. I found out that our stories were pretty similar which was probably why we became close.
“I broke up with my baby daddy when I was 6 months pregnant. I realized that he wouldn’t help me in any way after going for all the clinic visits alone.” She explained.
“That’s horrible.”
“I know. How is your relationship going?”
“It’s okay. We have a few issues but it’s not a big deal.”
I was hesitant to open up to her about my situation since I didn’t know if she would tell her friend and I would be the laughingstock of the apartment. The other women seemed so happy and loved in their relationships that I was scared they would think I was doing something wrong to make my baby daddy mad. So, I kept my problems to myself even though it was obvious I wasn’t happy at all.
Sarah kept checking in on me every day. We would talk over the phone and at times, she would come to visit me and keep me company while my baby daddy was at work. For the first time, I knew the real meaning of having a best friend. She would bring me food, clothes and a few gifts without asking for anything.
“I saw a really nice dress that would look good on you.” She said removing the dress from her bag. “Try it on.”
I wore the dress and sure enough, it looked good.
“You really know my style,” I said, smiling.
“Of course. Don’t remove it. I want to take you for lunch.” She offered.
“Thank you so much, Sarah, but you don’t have to do it. You’ve already done so much.”
“Nonsense. That’s what a best friend is for. I’m here to make your life easier, especially now that you’re close to your due date. By the way, have you packed your hospital bag?”
“Hospital bag? I don’t even know which hospital I will go to or where I’ll get the money to pay for the bill.”
“What about your baby daddy?”
At that point, I couldn’t lie anymore. Sarah had proved to be a genuine person and I needed someone to confide in.
“He doesn’t do anything for me. I have to beg him to even give me money for clinic visits and before he gives me, he beats me.” I said with tears in my eyes.
“What? Why didn’t you tell me this before?”
“I didn’t know what you would do.”
“You need to leave him. If he’s not helping you in any way, why are you still with him?”
“Where will I go? I don’t have any money or a job.”
“Don’t worry about that. You can come and stay with me until you get back on your feet.”
Sarah insisted that I should leave James. She even wanted me to leave that same day. However, I still wanted to try and save my relationship.
My due date drew closer and nothing changed. James was still abusive and didn’t care about my well-being. Finally, I packed my bags and moved to Sarah’s apartment. I was almost 8 months pregnant and ready to deliver yet I had nothing. I didn’t even have baby clothes.
Sarah suggested that we organize a small baby shower so that our friends could donate something to help me prepare for my bundle of joy.
Since most of our friends were from my old apartment, my baby daddy found out about the baby shower and showed up, burning with anger. He went straight to Sarah and grabbed her by the neck.
“So you’re the one who invited my wife to run away with my child?” He barked.
I couldn’t intervene since I was heavily pregnant and I knew that it would only escalate the situation to physical violence. The other ladies tried to pull the two apart but it didn’t seem to work. The two exchanged heated words and Sarah tried to throw a few punches.
“What kind of man beats a woman while she’s pregnant?” She screamed at him.
People started murmuring and looking at me as if I was a wounded animal that was about to be put down. I sat alone trying not to cry. After nearly an hour, the situation deescalated then James came towards me.
“I will tell your whole family that you’re living with a woman instead of the father of your child.” He said then went away.
Despite the drama, my baby shower was successful. I got so many gifts and donations that I was able to take care of my new bundle of joy for months without spending a single shilling.
I don’t know whether James ever told my family of the situation nor did I care if he did. My family was nowhere to be seen when I was being beaten so it didn’t matter what they thought about me. The only person whose opinion matters in my life is my best friend.
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