Society places a premium on romantic relationships, elevating them above all others. For this and more reasons, people don’t put as much effort into their platonic relationships as they do their romantic ones. Losing a friend can be just as painful, even more heartbreaking than losing a romantic relationship. For many people, their friendships are their longest relationships outside of family. Here are some signs you’re losing a friend and tips on how to cope with it.
Communication is non-existent or difficult
One of the first indicators that something is off is communication problems. Do you find that you’re not talking as much as you used to do and when you do it’s strained? The natural flow you had is gone and you struggle to talk about personal topics. Meaningful conversations are the hallmark of solid friendships.
You don’t share major life events
Not sharing major life events is a huge indicator that you no longer value each other and the relationship like you used to. You’re just not as interested in each other’s lives. If you find yourself not itching to share celebratory events in particular, it may be time to reexamine your friendship.
You don’t initiate making plans and often cancel
If you say you’ll get together and even make plans to do it but then fail to follow through, there may be a problem. If the two of you make rarely plans to meet and constantly cancel them when you do complete with bad made-up excuses, something’s up. Making plans with no intention of following through is something you do with acquaintances, not friends. Friends make time for each other and while how often you see each other may change over the relationship, if it’s down to almost zero, there may be something going on. You may also notice that they don’t invite you to things and you likely don’t do the same, especially for events you used to share.
They seem miserable around you
It’s normal for people to have periods where they’re emotionally low, however, if your friend always seems miserable around you for no reason, you may be losing them. It’s concerning if they just seem to never enjoy your company and they’re not like this with other people.
They tell you they have concerns about the friendship
Some people will just come out and say it. They may tell you what concerns they have or just outright say the relationship is no longer working for them. While it may be hard to hear, it may give you an opportunity to fix things if both of you are open to that. In the event that you or they don’t want to work on the relationship, at least you know where you stand and are not left wondering what’s what.
Other signs you may be losing a friend
- You start becoming judgmental about their choices
- You feel like you’re the only one trying
- You start having more bad moments than good
- Hanging out with them isn’t the same
- You aren’t bothered by their absence from your life
- You can’t seem to let go of past fights
- They lose your trust
- You aren’t supported by them anymore or don’t feel supported
- You miss the good old days and are only hanging on to the relationship because of the past
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