Friendships end, but most of the time you may not even know when it happens. This ending may be inevitable, and sometimes, there is nothing one can do to prevent it. However, one thing that is not inevitable is knowing when the friendship has ended and when you have become a fan.
When a friendship ends, one may fail to notice and continue being “the good friend .” Checking up on the other individual and not receiving the same care from them in return. You become like a fan. Fans know their celebrities, checking on their lives now and then and knowing what’s up, but do stars care about their lives? Exactly, they do not. A friendship ending without your noticing will likely lead to this relationship dynamic.
Different cases may be mistaken for this dynamic. You can conclude that your friendship has ended except that you need to realize that when an individual is going through a hard time, they may shut down, and you may experience some distance from them. However, this is different because;
1. You know your friend
You always have a good understanding of who your friend is and how they behave when they are going through a hard time. You know how things are when your friend is in different situations, and you always have a way of interacting with them appropriately.
2. You see that they are going through some struggle
When the distance and coldness result from difficult moments, you will know because you may see a struggle on their end.
3. They may have mentioned this before
In your earlier conversations, they might have mentioned some things that might be a problem for them. Upon your reflections on things that could bring this distance between you, talks you have had in the past may reveal what is going on and why they are not being responsive at this particular moment or time period.
These features make the celebrity-fan-like dynamics different because, in this case, your friend may not be in a good place or they may be going through something that may make them zone off from the relationship. They will need your help in this case.
On the other hand, you are a fan when your friend is in a good place but;
1. You constantly check on them, and they do not check on you
You go through your conversations and realize that you are the only one initiating the conversations. You are the only one calling every time you have spoken through the phone.
You do not seem to remember the last time they called or checked up on how you were doing. This realization means you are keeping things up and moving and that if you do not call or text, there won’t be a conversation between you.
Your friendship has ended when you are the has ended and when you have become a fan.
2. They keep you in the dark about things you used to talk about
Your conversations have become a monologue. You share things from your end, and they keep things closed from their end. You have no idea of how they are doing, in detail, like it usually is with friends.
You may want to make attempts for them to tell you what’s up, but your attempts start to feel like you are pushing buttons that should not even be touched in the first place. So, the topics that once light up your conversations as friends seem uncomfortable to even think about.
3. You do not have good times anymore
Friendships are interesting primarily because of the good times that people get to have. Maybe you used to go to events, nights out, or even shopping together when there was time. However, these days you are the one wondering what happened to the good times you people had.
From the other end, your supposed friend does not find it as a change that has affected your friendship. They are okay with the drift.
When such things start happening, chances are high that your friendship will end or has ended. You better watch out and act appropriately not to become a fan. Though you may give the friendship the benefit of the doubt, be open to the idea that it may be time to look for new friends.
Here are more articles you may want to check out
Relationships: 6 Ways To Get Over A Friendship Heartbreak
How To Maintain Strong And Lasting Friendships
The Importance Of Female Friendships
How Bad Relationships Affect Your Health
8 Friendship Red Flags You Should Watch Out For
15 Types Of Friends We All Have. What Role Do You Play in Your Circle of Friends?