Psychologists believe that childhood experiences can have a lasting impact on a person’s emotional, psychological, and behavioural patterns, persisting into adulthood and affecting their relationships and overall well-being. These experiences include everything from being yelled at to being rejected by your peers and even significant trauma like abuse.
Healing your inner child is a therapeutic approach that focuses on helping individuals heal past emotional wounds and traumas experienced during childhood. This approach can be beneficial for everyone but it’s most recommended for people who have experienced traumatic events in their past or feel they had a rough childhood. Here are some exercises to heal your inner child.
Tips for healing your inner child
- Acknowledge your inner child: recognize and accept that there are things that caused you pain as a child that have shaped and continue to influence your life
- Listen to your inner child: pay attention to the feelings that come up and your triggers, especially those that trace back to childhood events
- Use positive language when you speak to yourself and be compassionate with you
- Be curious about yourself and your past and the experiences that have shaped you and motivated your actions. Be curious about your behavioural patterns and try to look into them.
Exercises to heal your inner child
Write a letter
Writing a letter to your inner child is a great way to connect with yourself. For example, you could write a letter from your perspective as an adult addressing something consequential that happened, that has stuck with you and shaped you. Acknowledge that something happened and offer yourself the reassurance you wish you had received from the adults in your life. “I’m sorry that this happened, and I really want to make sure you feel safe now.”
Related to this is journaling. Journaling has long been used as a therapeutic exercise and can be a useful exercise towards healing your inner child. Writing can help your release negativity and organize your thoughts. You’re free to write whatever you want based on your experiences, everything including your feelings, struggles, mental health concerns, and achievements. It’s an opportunity to vent and afterwards offer your inner child the words of encouragement and love you wish you had received. You can read those words out loud to yourself to help you let go and begin to heal.
6 Reasons Why You Should Consider Keeping A Daily Journal
Speak aloud to your inner child
If writing is not your thing or you have concerns about being so vulnerable on a medium that could be found and accessed by someone else, you can try speaking out loud to your inner child. Picture your inner child as sitting in the room next to you or in you and talk to them in the same way one would an imaginary friend, addressing any big and small issues that have affected you and offering the love and reassurance you never received.
Make time to play
Adulthood exerts so many demands on us that adults rarely have time to power down much less engage in activities that bring them joy. One key element of childhood is play. Children play. Play is about being free and letting your creativity flow. It’s about engaging in activities simply because of the joy they bring to your life whether it’s singing or colouring or even running barefoot through the grass. Listen to your inner child’s idea of fun and do it without judging yourself as you’re wont to do in a hyper-productivity-focused society. Take some time to just humour your inner child, going so far as doing the things you found fun when you were younger.
Hug yourself
Physical touch is a fundamental aspect of human connection. It plays a vital role in our well-being and is essential for healthy relationships and social interactions. This is why holding yourself and hugging your inner child is a great exercise in healing. One way to do this is to hold yourself tight and even rock if necessary. Another is to try the butterfly hug. The butterfly hug is a self-soothing exercise designed to help people process trauma. To practice the butterfly hug:
- Cross your hands over your chest
- Link your thumbs together to form the butterfly’s body
- Position your fingertips just below your collarbones
- Tap your chest by alternating the movement of your hands – tapping with your left hand, then your right hand
- Take slow, deep breaths and gently observe your thoughts and feelings without judgment
You can also consider working with a therapist if you’re able.
Check out
Children And Trauma: How To Help
Parenting: Anxiety In Children – Symptoms And Strategies To Help
7 Ways For Adults To Heal From Childhood Bullying
