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Woman in a boutique. Image from https://qcitymetro.com/2022/03/22/queens-of-queen-city-black-women-who-own-businesses-in-charlotte/

Woman in a boutique. Image from https://qcitymetro.com/2022/03/22/queens-of-queen-city-black-women-who-own-businesses-in-charlotte/

The Singlehood Series: We Started A Business Together But She Ran Off With Another Man

My father tried to warn me but I always defended Nyambura.

Singlehood Series by Singlehood Series
March 10, 2023
in The Singlehood Series
Reading Time: 6 mins read
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My father had warned me against Nyambura but who was I to listen? After all, he didn’t understand today’s dating culture. Women were no longer submissive and obedient to men. Instead, they went out and conquered the world just like their male counterparts. That was the thing I loved most about Nyambura. She embodies a strong woman and I saw a bright future with her. In fact, I helped her establish a business so she could achieve her dreams.

People felt like I was making a mistake to support a girl that I wasn’t married to like that but I didn’t care. One person who didn’t hold back his disapproval was my father. From the day he met Nyambura, he didn’t like her.

“How is she like at home?” He asked once she left.

“I don’t know, dad. I haven’t lived with her.”

“She didn’t even help your mother clear the table or wash the dishes?”

“Dad, that’s a non-issue. I can get a house help to do that work.”

“And your children? Who will wash them?”

“You’re funny, dad.”

“I’m not joking. I don’t think she will make a good wife for you, my son.” 

Despite his opinion, I still maintained my relationship with Nyambura. In fact, I went as far as to ask her to move in with me. Sure enough, she wasn’t good at cooking or cleaning. She sat all day and watched YouTube videos. When evening came, she would call me at work and ask me to buy food for dinner.

Again, I didn’t have much of a problem with it at first but once the honeymoon phase of our relationship ended, I started to notice all her flaws. She wasn’t contributing to anything in the apartment. I paid all the bills, bought the food and I had to hire a cleaner to wash my place twice a week. It started to take a toll on my mental well-being since I had so much on my mind.

She had always wanted to start a business and I thought it was the perfect time for her to start. Nyambura had an impeccable fashion sense. Every time we went out, people would compliment her outfits. So, I suggested that she starts a boutique business.

“I think it would do well. You know so much about the latest trends.” I said.

It took a little convincing but she finally agreed and I helped her set up the business. She had some savings but I had to top up a lot. However, I was happy to see my woman excelling.

Just as I had predicted, the business peaked quickly and she set up a physical store in town. It was her proudest moment and I was there to celebrate the moment with her. However, barely a month after she set up the physical shop, Nyambura changed her attitude towards me.

“I don’t know if she feels overwhelmed by the business or what?” I explained to my father.

“Just give it some time.”

It was a strange turn of events to see my father defend Nyambura for once but it gave me hope that things would change. Besides, I didn’t have much of an option since I had spent a huge chunk of my savings setting up the business for her.

Despite my protest, nothing changed. It actually got worse. She started coming home in the dead of the night even when I knew that she closed her shop at 7.30 pm or earlier on some days earlier.

“I went for dinner with my friends.” She said when I confronted her.

“Why didn’t you invite me?” 

“It was a girls’ thing.”

“Okay, but I really don’t like the late-night outings you’ve been having lately.”

That was the first time that I directly confronted her and let’s just say things didn’t go well.

“What do you want? Do you want to break up?” She asked aggressively.

It caught me by surprise since I hadn’t even hinted or said anything about breaking up but she still brought it up. She then went to the bedroom and started packing her clothes. I had to calm her down and apologize so she would stay. However, this became a trend for many months.

Then, I found out why she had suddenly changed up on me. It turns out she was having an affair with another man. I called one of her friends to ask if Nyambura was at her place and she let the cat out of the bag.

“She’s been lying to you. She’s been going out with this guy almost every night.”

Somehow, I didn’t think Nyambura would do anything like that to me. I had been so patient and accommodating with her yet this was the thanks she gave me. She did the most humiliating thing you can do to a man yet I had treated her like a queen. 

I confronted her about the cheating allegations and just as I expected, she threatened to break up.

“You know what, if you want to break up with me, do it but I want my money back.”

“What money?”

“The one I gave you to start the business.”

She laughed so hard, she was in tears.

“If you want the business, you can keep it.”

She then packed her bags and left. She didn’t give me the business back. In fact, I had to file a case so I could get my money back. That was how I found out that she had run off with another man. Even her close friends didn’t know where she was but they knew the man she ran off with.

I managed to sell some of the business stock to recover my money but I didn’t get the full amount back. Additionally, the whole experience changed my relationship with women. I’m no longer as trusting or generous with them. I’m now more cautious and take my time before getting into a relationship.

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The singlehood series is a collection of real-life stories and opinions from different people. It looks at the current world of dating around the world and the experiences that people have gone through.

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