People go to clubs for different reasons. Most Kenyans frequent clubs because a favourite artist is performing, a celebrity DJ will be hosting at the club, to meet up with friends, unwind from a busy week and unfortunately, to steal.
Here are some of the most frequent characters in Kenyan clubs.
Jackpot
Popularly referred to as Chairman, this Kenyan is out to pay the bills every time he’s at the club.
Most of the people in his company are probably hanging out with him because he doesn’t ask to split the bill or dictate what people drink.
Mr Chairman ensures everybody is having a good time!
Dancers
These probable campus students in dance crews are out to show off their skills.
In rare settings, there’s a dancer in every group hanging out at the club, showing off their South African legs and Nigerian pride back shaking their bodies to all the songs popular on the internet.
Campus students
If there is one thing these bandwagons can do, is turn up! Students have a way of having fun at the club.
They often do what is called pre-game. Drink up before, hitting the club, so that they don’t have to pay extra for drinks. They get drunk before getting to the club, to cost-share a 1000 bob mzinga among 15 people. Trust them to have the most fun.
Club testers
This particular group of people enjoy being the thought leaders amongst their group of friends and on Twitter maybe. They enjoy giving reviews of a newly opened joint. They want that exclusive experience, and treatment so when they can give their opinions to people who haven’t been there before.
They most likely are going to a new club every weekend.
The plug
He’s the guy at the club that knows all the chics at the club if you want to link up. He knows a pedi or two in sight in case you need something. He knows the bouncer, a waiter or a taxi guy.
In short, he can fix a lot of things by simply being at the club, because he has “connections”.
The lavish Nairobi woman
There’s that Nairobi woman, with a touch of class, and elegance that’s just hanging out. Maybe alone or with a group of girls in the same class. While they spend their money, their sights are set on the elite bachelor’s, the who’s and who’s of Nairobi and the business class. You are likely to see a few notable figures on their Insta stories and timeline every now and again.
Stress drinkers
The economy is tough, and most people are grappling with a midlife crisis. This bandwagon is trying to figure out life, but that TikTok trend “If the money you have cannot feed you, eat that money” is probably the only motivation they understand.
Smokers especially shisha smokers
Kenyans are quite dynamic. Some people like to smoke at the club. Enjoy the music, and views, and hang out with friends but only smoke. Most of them barely drink liquor. They are so great at recommending shisha flavours.
Football fanatics
Something about watching football at the club is very native to Kenyans. You are most likely to meet men sipping slowly on two beers all afternoon till late the night just to watch soccer.
Most of these men prefer the noise at the club, to the little remote fights with the young ones or their wives that would rather watch a soap opera.
Drinkholics
These are drunkards. The ones you can never miss at your local joint and are always drunk 24/7. Whatever they do, wherever they are, alcohol must be involved!
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Promo girls
Companies are always running promotions for new products or boosting sales every other time. These girls are most likely to be in uniform, pushing sales while making their cash. While most of them have to deal with disrespect and indecent touching, they have become quite constant people at the club.
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Tea students
What is the Nairobi social scene without gossip? There’s always someone recording something on their phones unprovoked. They have all the pictures or videos of a celebrity couple that’s trying to keep their relationship private or a cheating partner. Weirdly, they might put you up as a subject of discussion on different social media channels.
Couple on a date
Going on dates at a club is still a practice that most Kenyans enjoy. Some couples have actually met at these clubs and they, therefore, keep the fire burning.
Joyriders
These Kenyans don’t pay for anything. Not for Uber, not for drinks, not for food. They basically, go to the club, and have the most fun at the expense of “Mr Chairman”. These people don’t mind holding the door, carrying a bag or running little errands for Mr Chairman, because he sorts out their bills.
Friends hangout
There’s a clique of friends that prefer to spend their time at the club. Talk politics, catch up on family or proceed with birthday celebrations or weddings at the club. They are just here to socialize and have a good time.
Ballers
These Kenyans are out to brag about the deals they closed this week, or a new contract they signed or whatever trips their bosses will be taking them on.
They care so much about their social status in society.
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