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Man holding an engagement ring image from https://www.salon.com/2013/05/12/why_are_men_still_proposing/

Man holding an engagement ring image from https://www.salon.com/2013/05/12/why_are_men_still_proposing/

The Singlehood Series: My Fiancé Is A Serial Cheater With 9 Kids From Different Women

Singlehood Series by Singlehood Series
April 18, 2019
in The Singlehood Series
Reading Time: 6 mins read
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There was always something a bit off about Mathew, my once fiancé. He’d spend hours on a “business call” every now and then but he worked a corporate job. I never questioned him because he was genuinely a loving and caring person. In fact, he was the boyfriend of the year. He seemed to get along with everyone until he met my sister, Turi. She was the self-appointed vetting committee of all my boyfriends and she didn’t like Mathew from the first day.

I couldn’t help but notice that Mathew was a lady’s man. He’d low-key flirt with any woman that breathes close to him. It made me uncomfortable at first. However, after some assurance, I didn’t think much of it. I trusted him blindly.

“I’m a man, you know.” He said. “I like beautiful things just like you.”

He had a way to make anything sound charming. Maybe it was his attractive physique or wallet. Either way, he got me and he got me good. I was like his puppet – the girl that used to party from Sunday to Sunday was playing house with somebody’s son. I was ecstatic in this new role. It felt like I finally settled down.

He didn’t waste any time popping the question. We were on holiday in Dubai when he went down on one knee in front of a crowd of people. He always liked attention on him. On the other hand, the abruptness shocked and embarrassed me. We barely dated for more than 6 months.

“Say yes.” The crowd urged as I looked down at this 6-foot man on his knees.

To be honest, I wasn’t sure whether to accept the proposal but I found myself nodding and crying at the same time. He whisked me up in the excitement and span me several times before planting a sensual kiss on my lips. Then I remembered why it was so hard to say no to him. I was now someone’s fiancé. But it was hard to forget the real purpose of the trip.

It was an apology after I caught him texting another woman. When I confided in my sister, her first reaction was to leave him.

“I told you something wasn’t right about him.” She said.

“Honestly, is he the first man to talk to another woman?” I defended him.

I was so accustomed to the comfort of being his girlfriend and fiancé that I turned a blind eye to every red flag – the secret phone calls, the open flirting and now this. My sister was convinced he put a spell on me because we weren’t raised like that. I wasn’t sure how she’d react to the news that I was his fiancé so I didn’t tell her until we got back to the country.

Man holding an engagement ring image from https://www.salon.com/2013/05/12/why_are_men_still_proposing/

As soon as we landed, the texts kept coming in Mathew’s phone then the phone calls. We hadn’t even reached the house but his business partners could not wait. When we got home, he took a quick shower and headed out without as much as a goodbye. I thought things would be different now that I was his fiancé but I guess not.

I invited my sister over for drinks and some catching up. Then, I dropped the bombshell.

“I’m engaged! I’m his fiancé!” I said excitedly flashing the gorgeous diamond ring.

She looked stunned but not as much as I thought. Maybe she was used to my randomness. However, Turi didn’t hold back her discontentment.

“So where is the husband to be? Didn’t you just land a few hours ago?” she asked sarcastically

“Relax, sister. Let’s celebrate my engagement. He’s probably celebrating with his friends too.”

“You genuinely don’t know where he is. He could be out cheating on you and you’re just seated here in your fantasy life.”

My sister was always brutally honest. She said it built character. But I was sweet, and kind-hearted. I found confrontation exhausting and unnecessary. I’d rather sit quietly and leave when I wanted to. So, each time Turi urged me to confront Mathew it seemed like an uphill battle to me.

We continued to chat until well into the night when we realized how late it was and Mathew hadn’t come home yet.

“I can’t let you sleep alone. I’ll stay here with you until he comes.” She offered.

What would I do without my sister?

I fixed us our fourth cocktail and we settled on the sofa. By then, we were both feeling rowdy and cursing out Mathew for leaving me alone all day. A few minutes later, he walked in looking visibly drunk and dishevelled which was unlike him. He didn’t notice my sister at first so he walked past me and straight into the kitchen to get some water. Coming back, their eyes met and he stopped.

“What is she doing here?” he asked

“Keeping me company while you were getting drunk. Where have you been?” my voice gradually grew firmer.

“Don’t ask me silly questions.” He replied. “And you, leave my house now. I need to talk to my fiancé.”

My sister didn’t feel like arguing. Plus, she had confidence I could handle it for once so she bade me goodbye and left. Mathew moved closer to me then went on his knees. His eyes were sunken as if he hadn’t slept for days. Something was clearly wrong.

“What’s going on?” I asked expecting the worst.

“I’ve lied to you this whole time.” He said. “I don’t have any businesses or business partners. Those phone calls have all been from women – multiple women.”

I was never really prepared to hear anything like that – even when I had my suspicions. Apparently, the woman I caught texting him was pregnant with his child and had delivered while we were away on holiday. But that wasn’t all. He told me about an ex-wife who had three of his children and two baby mamas with four children between them.

The disgust I felt was unimaginable. I felt like my soul had been tarnished yet he still had the audacity to ask if the engagement is still on. What a shameless man? No amount of money or good looks could excuse such humiliation.

I called my sister immediately who helped me pack and leave that hell of a man. We haven’t spoken since but I hear his latest baby mama lives with him in the same apartment I spent the last 6 months of my life. Anyway, that’s how life goes.

This story is based off a tweet we saw on Twitter.

More stories in the Singlehood Series

After 2 Years Of Raising My Daughter I Found Out I Wasn’t The Father

How I Drove My Boyfriend’s Pregnant Girlfriend To Deliver Their Baby Without Knowing

My Best Friend Found Out She Was The Other Woman Plus There Were 2 Baby Mamas After 2 Years

Single Lady In Nairobi: Making The Hard Decision On Whether To Keep The Baby

 

 

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The singlehood series is a collection of real-life stories and opinions from different people. It looks at the current world of dating around the world and the experiences that people have gone through.

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