I kept going back to the words she chanted to me like a song. “2 years! 2 years!” She was still in pain and shock but who wouldn’t be when you had just found out the man you planned on spending the rest of your life with had not one, but two baby mamas.
When I first heard about Alex, something didn’t feel right. It was one of those too good to be true feelings. Mel, my best friend, described him as a young, handsome guy with a successful career and a fancy car. Basically, he was every girl’s dream.
They met at an event where she was working as a hostess and though she was reluctant at first, she warmed up to the idea of dating him. After a month of texting back and forth, Alex set up a dinner date. That very night, barely 3 hours after confirming the time, he called her and insisted that they should meet at 10 pm due to some unavoidable business meeting. I found that weird but it wasn’t my place to stop her. Mel was already smitten and willing to take the risk.
For the next few weeks, they went out regularly but Alex did not invite Mel back to his place.
“He’s just a good guy. He doesn’t want to take advantage of me.” She would defend him.
“You realize how stupid you sound. The only times he takes you out is when he conveniently has business meetings. Something is not right, Melly.” I tried to make her see some sense and not her idea of the man.
“Maybe he still lives with his parents.” I knew she was joking but at the same time, she wanted to believe it.
“He drives a Prado, babe. He has a house.”
Three months passed and she was still seeing the guy. To be honest, I would too. He took her on exotic trips almost every month, bought her jewellery and put loads of money in her account. The concern shifted from whom he was dating on the side to who he was. I kept asking myself how such a young man could afford the lifestyle he lived. According to Mel, he was “barely older than us”. She didn’t even know his age.
One morning, she came home with uncontainable excitement and behind her was this tall, bulky man. It was the first time I saw him in person and he looked significantly older than Mel although he was fit. I welcomed them both and made him feel comfortable. He complimented our house then left after a short stay. I could see Mel giggling and snickering from the corner of my eye as I cleared the table.
“Please don’t tell me he proposed to you,” I said, expecting the worst.
“I was at his place.” She replied with the biggest smile. We both paused. It took me by surprise. I thought they would break up before she ever knew where homeboy lived. From the expression on her face, I assumed everything was okay. There were no crazy artworks, no secret dungeons and more importantly, no secret families.
“He has a gorgeous apartment in Kilimani.” She continued. “So, when we got back from Dar he asked me if I wanted to go back to his place which of course, I said yes. Then we pulled up to this luxurious apartment block you see kina Huddah posting on Instagram.” We laughed but I was finally assured that the man was not scamming my best friend.
For the rest of the surprisingly long-lived relationship, Mel shuffled between her normal life and her wild life with her boyfriend. She would tell me stories of the two and their latest escapade and all I could do was envy her life.
That was until two weeks ago when their relationship came to a dramatic end. Mel had gone over to visit her man on a Wednesday after work since she was having a tight work schedule over the weekend.
It was one of the few times she went to his place unannounced but she now had a key and thought she could surprise her beloved with a nice home cooked meal and her beautiful self. She went in, relaxed for an hour then started on dinner.
“I didn’t want to tell him I was home because I wanted him to have the full experience. I made him bomb dinner, cleaned up his place then I noticed a woman’s clothes in his wardrobe.” She explained.
Things got heavy so I poured us a glass of wine.
“I never left any clothes at his place since he told me there’s a mama who comes to clean and she steals clothes.” I laughed, not sarcastically. It just seemed funny to me. It was also a textbook excuse. However, I didn’t want to be insensitive to her so I composed myself and let her continue.
“It was around midnight and Alex hadn’t shown up. About an hour later, I had the doorknob turning and he walked in. I was literally seated on the kitchen floor sobbing. He was evidently surprised. I asked him about the clothes and he said they belonged to his sister. A sister I hadn’t heard about until now. He talked and talked for almost two hours then I decided to let it go.”
I thought things couldn’t get worse. She already found suspicious clothes.
“The next morning Alex woke up and prepared for work. Since I barely slept I decided to sleep in till midday. Just as I woke up to get some food, I heard a knock on the door. Thinking Alex had been sweet to order a delivery, I opened it like a naïve little girl.”
She described how the woman stormed into the house only to be met by a half-naked Mel. “So, we had a little stand-off until she literally pushed her way in. I thought she was lost so I asked who she was looking for. She said Alex and I literally burst out crying. I think that was the only thing that saved me from a beating. She was really sweet. She told me how she and Alex were in a relationship 4 years ago when she got pregnant and everything changed. We talked about how he was a serial cheater with her and how he was probably cheating on me with more than just her.”
I noticed she got emotional so I let her be for some time. I learned that, in fact, he was significantly older than us. He was in his late 30s with two children from two different women.
My pretty Mel was still crying about the two years she wasted on this man but at least she dodged a bullet before she ended up being just another baby mama.
The singlehood series is a collection of real-life stories and opinions from different people. It looks at the current world of dating around the world and the experiences that people have gone through.