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Image from http://kuulpeeps.com

Image from http://kuulpeeps.com

Serial Dating: What Not To Do

Elsie Ndonga by Elsie Ndonga
November 1, 2017
in Dating, Kenya, Marriage, Relationships
Reading Time: 4 mins read
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Over the years, dating or courtship has undergone various stages of evolution. From the days where the caveman clobbered his woman of choice and carried her unconscious body to his cave, to a time when men planted spears outside the girl’s hut to express romantic interest. Currently, dating has become a daunting process of trial and error-plagued with deceit and complication. There is little one can do to avoid this process. One can only cast their net and hope to catch a worthy fish. However, to increase their odds, people have become a little creative and are selecting more than fish one from the net- serial dating.

A study carried out by eHarmony Australia, revealed that people are tired of committing to one person and coming up short. They are more comfortable keeping their options open. As alluring as it may sound though, The Frisky lifestyle website indicates that there is an art that should be mastered when indulging in serial dating to prevent one from coming off looking like a shady player. This art can be simplified by the following points:

  1. Talking to one about the other

Once you find yourself seeing more than one person at a time, it is courteous to inform each of them that you are seeing other people. This establishes honesty in your new relationship. It also prevents you from feeling like you have to hide when going out on dates so as not to get ‘caught’. However, sharing details of one partner with another is greatly frowned upon. No one wants to hear details about your date with another person. It can not only get uncomfortable, but it can seem like you are trying to pit them against each other to compete for your attention. The key is to get to know each of these people individually and get to understand what they all have to offer.

  1. Having sexual relationships with all of them

There is a thin line between serial dating and becoming a player. Sexual relations are one of the things that keep that line in clear sight. It is vital that you abstain from indulging in any sexual relations with any of your partners. It provides a chance to learn about your partners in an environment rid of any sexual obligations. This can provide a stable foundation which is paramount in any healthy relationship.

  1. Flying into a jealous rage

Serial dating requires a higher level of maturity than most kinds of relationships. It is important to note that just as you are seeing multiple people, it is possible that your partners are seeing other people as well. If that is the case, throwing jealous tantrums and demanding that they drop these other partners would be very hypocritical of you. The important thing is to ensure that you both agree on the terms that you have set for your relationship.

  1. Stringing other partners along

The main objective of this arrangement is to finally select a partner whom you feel best suits you. Eventually, after spending time with these partners, you will either feel more attracted to one of them or none at all. At this time it is important to share your feelings with each of them so they may know where they stand. It can be easy to get addicted and lost in the allure of having more than one partner but it becomes a cruel game when you string along people you do not plan on committing to.

  1. Dating partners that know each other

Okay, this may not always be something you can help but you should endeavour to date partners that do not know each other. Dating co-workers or friends can get messy and ruin the independence of serial dating. To reduce the odds of this occurrence, you can try dating from different societal and work pools.

However serial dating has does have its issues. It is a slippery slope that you have to navigate with utmost precision. It requires self-confidence and a clear understanding of what you are looking for. However, if you are lucky it can culminate in finding yourself a jewel among the many rocks.

Here are 8 Pros And Cons Of Polyamorous Relationships

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Elsie Ndonga

Elsie Ndonga

The power of the written word fascinates me. It abides- cannot be forgotten. I write in the hopes that I can document the stories of everyone I meet and everything that I see.

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