When you get in a relationship your head is usually in the clouds, and you can be on cloud 9 for a while. At some point when you start thinking rationally, you may start to think that your partner is not that Mr. or Miss Perfect you thought they were.
If you have watched the movie the perfect guy you might understand what we are talking about. You meet the perfect guy, and everything is great. Then they start acting all weird and you don’t know if the person is having a bad day or if this is who they really are. You may be with someone whom you don’t understand with traits that show he/she lacks empathy and lies for no apparent reason. Does the person have an oversize ego among other unexplainable traits?
This person will manipulate you and change you into somebody else. They will control your life, and tell you who you should or should not talk to. They will basically take over your life. If you know there is something disturbing about the one you love but you cannot put your finger on it then this article is for you or for that friend who is going through this. If you’re in a position where your charming other half has managed to make his/her flaws look perfectly normal especially if the following traits look familiar then you need to plan an exit or learn to deal with this new person you have discovered.
The following red flags should alarm you.
1. Having an oversized ego: according to psychologists, sociopaths are narcissists to the extreme. They have a huge sense of entitlement and tend to blame others for their own failures.
2. Lying and exhibiting manipulative behaviour: They basically lie for the sake of lying or sometimes to test their ability to trick people. Sometimes they may push their lies to a larger audience in order to see how far they can go when they cause damage.
3. Lack of empathy: No, your partner is not too strong or something like that. They do not have a meaningful emotional sense within them. Feeling towards people or an emotional world is foreign to them as they live in their own world where things revolve around them.
4. Showing a lack of remorse or shame: Normal people usually show fear when they see disturbing images or are threatened. Sociopaths are hardly moved by what goes on around them or to them. Experiences that should trigger emotion in them such as a car accident, they are not moved.
5. Behaving irresponsibly or with extreme impulse: When it comes to their finances they tend to be careless and carefree. They bounce from goal to goal and act on the spur of the moment. Their commitment to obligations and commitments is also usually a challenge and tend to escape any serious obligation to the people that love and care for them.
6. Have few friends: friends in a sociopath’s world are those that are superficially connected to them. They tend to not need friends and do not have real ones. All the friends they have are only remembered when needed for a particular thing they may want or need. They use people for their own benefit.
7. Being superficially charming: These kinds of people are very charismatic and charming because they know it will help them get what they want. If there’s something they can do very well is to play con artist as they usually have a secret agenda. A sociopath knows how to be a chameleon and they blend right into any environment. Do not forget they have a double personality, meaning they can be anything you want them to be.
8. Living by the “you only live once principle”: For this group of people as long they can avoid consequences, they will do it. They live their life in the fast lane and for the thrill of it. To the point that they can seek stimulation, excitement and pleasure from wherever they can get it as long as they get their quick fix.
9. Show disregard for societal norms: They don’t believe that societal norms apply to them and end up breaking rules.
10. Eye contact: they have no problem with maintaining uninterrupted eye contact. This means they can lie to you without flinching.
If any of the above signs seem all too familiar then it is time to analyze your other half and think twice before going any deeper. Seek help from counsellors and remember you have the power to move on. Heal your heart, heal your soul, and be selective about who is the recipient of your love.
This article might interest you. It is about what to expect if you are dating a sociopath.
Vanessa Raychael is a young writer passionate about writing. She is a student at Daystar University. She has written for the People newspaper as a fiction writer and she also hosts a show in a gospel station known as Vision TV. During her spare time, she likes nature trails, spending time with friends and going for events. You can check out her work on her blog nochills.blogspot.com