They say old habits die hard and against all odds, this story of a parent who got canned after coming to school to represent a fake student just did it for me. But above everything, it took me years back to the thrill of getting away with mischievous acts and to a time when we thought the world was just at a standstill waiting for us to become leaders of tomorrow. Allow me to take you back.
In my high school, the biggest offence, you could ever commit was to make noise. Having a phone or talking to boys came close, but always being on the noisemakers list would often lead to expulsion. Other offences like fighting, stealing and bullying were just petty crimes and at most, you would be asked to fetch a parent because you were still redeemable.
So this one time, a group of girls and I decided enough was enough. I remember this particular incident quite vividly because it was the only time I almost got suspended. We were in Form Three and at the time our mortal nemesis was the prefect who was like doom in our day, the dark inside the tunnel, the bane of our existence, and the dark side of our moon.
How else would you refer to someone who would write down your name in the noisemakers list, just for future reference? To her, we made noise ahead of time. So we came up with a plan.
One of us was to steal the noisemakers’ book and throw it in the toilet while the rest of us served as alibis. Easy, right? As you guessed, the plan was successful.
But that was until the one who stole the book shared the secret with another member who was not part of the group. Perhaps the guilt was too great for her to bear but all I can remember is after she did nothing was the same again. We felt it though. They say bad news reaches the subjects last but in our case, we could feel it in our bones. Who couldn’t? The night before our doomsday the reporter was acting weird. Everyone was anxious and on her neck wanting to know if she had slipped.
She denied it but we knew something was up so we all slept packing and preparing for the infamous expulsion.
There was another problem.
Our group was made up of five including me. Three were all-time offenders and two had only one shot left before being expelled. So when the principal called us out on the assembly ground the following morning, I knew I was done for.
While my friends were counting on bringing fake parents in the case of a suspension, I was counting on Plan A (denying the incident) to work because it would take me a while to find a fake representative. How could I when I couldn’t even pull off a disguise? Like this one time, we were caught in the dormitory during church hours and the teacher sent out for me after she had finished rounding up and serving punishments to all the others. Her message was, ata Chalker na iyo weupe anadhani atajificha? The rest is history.
Luckily, denying worked. We only got punished by studying from the assembly ground and then cleaning the corridors in the evening for one week. I can’t imagine how things would have turned out because if we had gotten suspended, let’s just say we wouldn’t have to look far to find a story on a parent who was canned and suspended alongside their fake daughter.
I’m also surprised that old tricks are still in use in 2020.
