We all have that one friend whose life is like a drama series. There is always an interesting story somewhere. Robert is that friend for me. You could leave him at 11 PM all peaceful and jolly and by midday the following day, he will have dramatic stories. I wasn’t surprised when he asked me to meet him for a late lunch to tell me about how a woman conned him out of his chama money. This was a first for him, being conned out of a large amount was new.
He had been complaining that women only wanted his money. His friends laughed at him and told him that he lacked the sixth sense in judging character. In fact, the previous weekend he had proven them right once again.
“So what are you doing for the evening?”
“My boys and I are going to K1 for a few rounds,” he texted her back.
Therefore, she told him to let her know when he left the house. He lives on Mombasa Road and she was in Roysambu. It slipped his mind to tell her when he was leaving the house, so he got a text asking him whether he had left. He was already with his boys. His short memory did not amuse her but 30 minutes later, she was at K1 too.
“Hey, I am here but mtu wa Uber anataka kukuongelesha (the Uber driver wants to speak with you),” She said.
He was a bit confused. Why would the Uber person want to have a word with him? Did he know him? Nevertheless, he to see this Uber driver.
“Boss, fare ni 800.” (The trip cost 800 shillings).
He laughed to himself as he paid the Uber driver. The girl had invited herself into his plans, made him pay for her cab ride and then came with three more girls. Needless to say, his spending meter only went higher.
He swore to make better choices. So last weekend he went out to hang out with his boys. That is when he noticed a beautiful lady seated at the bar.
She was seated at the corner of the counter in a strategic position with a clear view of the football match on the screen. She was in light blue tight jeans, black 6-inch heels, and a crisp white blouse. You could see her cleavage through her slightly unbuttoned blouse. Her hair was short on one side exposing her pear-shaped face. The beautiful smile and burgundy lipstick accentuated her lips. He gasped at how divine she looked.
The beautiful woman only had a purse and an iPhone X on the counter next to her drink. He would later learn that it was a Long Island after asking for the same drink as an ice breaker. Before he could even utter a word, Arsenal scored again.
“It’s about time!” She said with a molar-to-molar grin. You could tell she was one of the few remaining loyal Arsenal fans.
“Today is clearly your night. Two goals already and it’s still the first half?”
“New game plan was probably what we needed. Overreliance on the Lacazette and Aubameyang duo was limiting us it seems.”
She was impressive and he wasted no time. So they got talking. In fact, they had common career interests. Three hours later, they were leaving the club. She insisted on taking care of the bills. Jackpot! He had finally found a girl who was different from his ‘usual’ kind. He could already see himself bragging to his boys about how he had finally met a different one. They decided to go back to his place. So he led the way and she followed in her SUV. The night must have been very eventful because she stayed over until Monday.
It was Monday already and he was experiencing another kind of hangover. It wasn’t the usual alcohol hangover. He could already sense that he would be nostalgic for the wonderful weekend with an amazing classy and independent woman. They had even discussed some business plans that we could look into together. In his head, he could see a knot at the end of it.
She woke up before him. He found her seated on the couch in his shirt, and was busy on her laptop. As he got his cup of coffee, her gasp caught his attention.
“What’s wrong?” He asked.
“These stupid online banking systems are at it again. I need to make a transaction immediately for some goods so that they can ship them.”
He could understand how the systems could mess up plans. So he asked her how much she needed. Without any hesitation, he wired her $1000. She would refund it as soon as the systems were back online. She did something on her laptop and soon they both prepared to leave the house.
He could feel the new surge of energy in him. Everyone at work noticed it too. It was Monday and he was so productive, that never happened. The chatting continued for the next couple of days until he asked the question.
“Are the systems back online?”
This was the begining of his nightmare. Little did he know he was about to find out that she had conned him. Ghosting him was the first step. He couldn’t reach her via phone, and couldn’t find her on social media either. She had mentioned her workplace and residence, so he went to check them out.
“I am looking for a tall light-skinned lady who drives a BMW X3 who lives here,” he told the apartment building’s watchman.
“Ai, no one in this building drives such a car and the only light-skinned lady here is short,” responded the sympathetic watchman.
Nobody seemed to know her name neither by description nor by name. Robert’s mind was swirling in thoughts. On one hand, he wired her money meant for his Chama. He was to repay a loan that he had taken out. On the other hand, he was nursing a broken heart. He had not seen this coming, not from miles away. Desperate to find either her or his money he went back to the bar where they had met. Everything screamed she had conned him but he was still in denial.
“Boss, have you seen the lady I was with last weekend at the counter? She’s a regular here.”
The barman was very confident that he had never seen her before at the club and she hadn’t gone back. It was clear he had been conned by the woman. Remember, the vision he had of bragging to his friends that he had finally gotten better at choosing women? That was also a distant memory now. He had done worse by being conned off such an amount by a woman. So he sat there and asked for another Long Island probably hoping he could escape to one.
This story is loosely based on a true story on social media.
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