fbpx
Potentash
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Fiction
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Skin + Beauty
  • Health
  • Relationships
No Result
View All Result
  • Login
Potentash
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Fiction
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Skin + Beauty
  • Health
  • Relationships
No Result
View All Result
  • Login
Potentash
No Result
View All Result

Managing expectations in relationships!

Rayhab Gachango by Rayhab Gachango
February 19, 2014
in Opinions, Relationships, Uncategorized
Reading Time: 3 mins read
104 4
1
130
SHARES
720
VIEWS
FacebookTwitterWhatsApp

harps and hearts.

I attended Harps and Hearts which is a concept by Barbra Olesi to bring fun into Christian dating. We had a night of music and laughter as we listened to James Okumu talking to us about relationships. Barbra was kind enough to share her notes with me on what James Okumu talked about.

EXPECTATIONS IN RELATIONSHIPS. Talk by James Okumu)

1. What standards have you set for your relationship? Are they God’s or your standards? It is important to determine what matters most. Is it your woman’s beauty or her character? Is it your man’s money or godliness? Whatever you chose has pro and cons. Do the math.

2. You need to define your relationship. Make it clear from the word go whether you are dating for marriage or just for the pleasure of the company. Make sure you are on the same page with the other person. Every relationship is headed somewhere and each spouse has expectations. Make your expectations clear. Lady, don’t be shy to ask if you don’t understand what consistent coffee dates mean. Is it just coffee or is the guy interested in you? If you are unsure whether you are dating, please ask.

3. Perfect spouses don’t exist. Much as you want a list of things you want your spouse to have, don’t be stiffened up on expectations of unimportant things. A tall, dark, and handsome man or pretty woman with curves are quite a catch. However, what if you met the person you desire in terms of character and godliness but they are not as hot as you desire will you just let them slip away? The perfect spouse never existed in real life so learn to excuse some flaws.

relationships-are-like-glass

4. While you are being careful with your list remember that there are some non-negotiables like religion or salvation or doctrine. If you don’t both believe in the same God or one is saved and the other is not there’s bound to be problems. If you believe in speaking in tongues and they don’t you’ll not will you be free to exercise your worship in this way. If you believe in going to church on Sunday and they believe in going to church on Saturday, what happens to your children? Do they attend the Saturday or Sunday church? It is important to talk about such early in the relationship. That is why it is important to attend premarital counseling so that you can discuss such issues ahead of time.

5. Know your identity away from your spouse. Don’t lose yourself as you try to fit into their desires. Don’t throw away your beliefs and values as you try to fit into a relationship.

6. Don’t overlook everything just because your desired mate says they are saved. What doctrine do they believe in? Some Christians believe it’s ok to drink a little alcohol some don’t take alcohol at all. Make sure you understand what salvation means to them and if it resonates with your belief.

7. This is especially for men. Do not date more than one person at the same time. It’s never a wise thing to cause people pain in this way.

8. The person you’ll marry is very likely to be in your circles. Open your eyes and appreciate the people around you. They might be the person you are looking for.

9. Invest in a relationship with someone you are attracted to physically. That attraction is important for your appreciation of each other especially once you get married.

10. Guard your heart. This is especially for ladies. Don’t open up to everyone that looks interested in you. Be secretive with the details of your life because not all your details are for the public and they can as well be the reason why you turn the other person off.

good-relationships-dont-just-happen-1348306978

Share52Tweet33SendShare9Pin12
Previous Post

I Used To Know That Girl @MichaelKwambo

Next Post

Safaricom International Jazz Festival

Rayhab Gachango

Rayhab Gachango

Potentash Founder. A creative writer and editor at Potentash. Passionate about telling African stories. Find me at hi@potentash.com

Next Post

Safaricom International Jazz Festival

Please login to join discussion

Recommended

The Innisfree green tea balancing lotion Ex

Product Review: Innisfree Green Tea Balancing Lotion Ex

August 10, 2020
894
image from https://www.istockphoto.com/photos/black-couple-fight

Relationships: 7 Tips For Managing Relationship Conflicts

May 21, 2021
101

Popular Stories

  • Woman crying as man comforts her. Image from https://livelystones.com.ng/communication-problems-with-wife-is-bothering-hubby-please-advise/

    I Went To Surprise My Husband At The Office Only To Find Out He Had Been “Working From Home” During The Pandemic

    616 shares
    Share 246 Tweet 154
  • My Divorce Left Me Broken

    195 shares
    Share 78 Tweet 49
  • An Uber Driver Ruined My Relationship

    149 shares
    Share 60 Tweet 37
  • An Office Affair Landed Me In The Hospital

    193 shares
    Share 77 Tweet 48
  • The Singlehood Series: My Husband Forced Me To Become A Housewife

    18 shares
    Share 7 Tweet 5
Potentash

Potentash is an award-winning lifestyle blog. We publish lifestyle content that intersects with health, women, beauty, travel, business, relationships, finances and entertainment.

Categories

  • Ethics Statement
  • Terms & Conditions
  • Privacy Policy
  • Contact Us

Copyright © 2022. Potentash, In Partnership with Decima

  • Login
No Result
View All Result
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Fiction
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Skin + Beauty
  • Health
  • Relationships

Copyright © 2022. Potentash, In Partnership with Decima

Welcome Back!

Sign In with Linked In
OR

Login to your account below

Forgotten Password?

Retrieve your password

Please enter your username or email address to reset your password.

Log In