Listening to Michelle Obama’s speech at the Democratic Convention many people were inspired. I was awed by her speech. She connected with me on a personal level. Then the questions started being asked why can’t Kenyan women or rather why cant my woman be like that. This post deals with how a man can help his lady can become a first lady.
There is a saying behind every successful man there is a woman. I agree 100%. The thing is it’s not always his girlfriend or wife; it could also be his mother. Well that’s a topic for another day. When we look at President Obama we see how his wife, his mother, and his grandmother have shaped the man that he became. They all encouraged him to pursue his dreams. If Michelle Obama had not supported her husband he would not have become President of the US and in turn she would never have become the First Lady.
I want to look at how women become first ladies. I believe that men and women are equal, but they are complimentary to each other. There are some things that they can each do well but others one can do better. I know I will be shot by feminists for that statement.
Anyway men are complaining about their women not being like the first lady. I would like to get a few points from her speech.
• Her father even though he was ill supported her and her brother to go to school. He encouraged both of them and paid for both of them to go to college. As she states “You see, for my dad, that’s what it meant to be a man.” He may not have had enough money but he did his best for both his children then the state did the rest.
• He worked hard to support his family.
• He gave Michelle the same opportunities that he gave his son.
• When Michelle looked at Obama he was just like her dad, brought up in the same kind of way that she was, with the same values.
• Obama finds time to take her out on dates, he is still romantic.
• Obama even though he is president still finds time to spend with his two daughters. He is never too busy to spend time with his family.
What do all these things have in common? In order for Michelle to be the super first lady that she is, she had the support of great men.
There are many women who say that they do not need a man to survive especially feminists. Some single mothers even say that their children don’t need a father.
While I believe that women can survive without getting married or can raise a child by themselves I think they forget something. We all have had men who pushed us up and helped us to be successful. It could be your dad who paid your fees or encouraged you to be all you can be. It could be your grandfather who was proud of you. It could be your brother who stood up and still stands up for you when you’re having difficulties.
We are all a product of nature versus nurture. We were born women and we are expected to take a certain role in society. There are roles defined for a woman, a mother, a home maker, a peace maker etc. But these are not the only things a woman can do. A woman can make an excellent leader. For that she needs support. But the nurture that we get especially from the men in our lives can help us go far in a male dominated world.
So men if you want your woman and other women in your life to become Michelle Obama’s ask yourself:
• Do your support your woman’s dreams? Do you even know what they are?
• Are you supportive of her ideas or you merely put her down?
• How do you treat your daughters or sisters? It will determine the type of woman she will become.
• Do you consult her wife or girlfriend when making decisions? Some people have a tendency to make decisions and expect the automatic support of their spouse. Obama asked Michelle if he could run for president and she gave him the go ahead. They work as a team that is why he is able to focus on his job. He has 99 problems and Michelle ain’t one of them.
• Are you paying the bills and acting like a real man? Because if you aren’t she will and she will not respect you because she is doing your job. She is basically wearing the pants in the house.
• Do you still make her feel special? Obama still takes his wife out on dates so she feels loved and appreciated.
• Do you tell your daughters that they can be anything that they want to be and encourage them?
• Do you tell your woman thank you for all the things she does to make your life run smoothly?
Men, it is good to want a wife or a girlfriend who can encourage you and make you achieve your dreams. But if you don’t give her support and love then she will become bitter and not be your number one fan. To become the great man you want to be, treat your women well. After all behind every successful man is a woman and you can take that to the bank and cash it.
I would welcome your comments on this post. Do you agree or disagree with it?
Potentash Founder. A creative writer. The Managing Editor at Potentash. Passionate about telling African stories and stories about the inclusion of minorities. Find me at email@example.com.
“We're all stories, in the end.” ― Steven Moffat