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Drum rolls please – The best politician awards

Rayhab Gachango by Rayhab Gachango
May 8, 2012
in Uncategorized
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I have been inspired by a recent bloggers award ceremony. I think there should be politicians’ awards. Here are a few categories. It combines sports and entertainment.

1. The best javelin award. Nominate the politician who you believe has stabbed the most people in the back.

2. The best musical chairs award goes to the politician you believe will end up in the presidency seat after the whole hullabaloo of running around circling the presidency seat in 2013.
3. The best hip hop award goes to the politician who has hip hoped from one party to another in order to remain relevant.
4. The best soul award goes to the politician who has sold over his soul over so many times that his soul is compromised and his chances of making it to heaven are dim.

5. the best rap award goes to the politician who has managed to avoid going to prison the most times and getting a rap sheet
6. The best rock award goes to the politician who knows to gather a crowd and entertain them.
7. The best jazz award goes to the politician who can jazz the country with his comedy routine.
8. The best actor/actress award goes to the politician goes to the politician who acts the most sincere of the bunch.
9. The best blues award goes to the politician who knows how to seduce their audience until their audience is in love with them.
10. The best rugby award (team) goes to the political party that knows how to get down and dirty and will score the winning touchdown in 2013.
11. The best swimmer award goes to the politician who can outswim the sharks that are waiting to draw blood.

12. The best steeplechase award (team coordination) goes to the party that you think will not lose their baton in the race to the presidency and will finish intact at the finish line.
13. The best tweep award goes to the politician who has mastered through the use of a PR agency, ghost writer, or occasional appearance the art of using social media.
14. The best wrestling award goes to the politician who knows how to fight one on one with their opponent.
15. The best athlete award goes to the politician who can run away fastest when there is trouble but can be back in a flash when it is over.

I know that I have not comprehensively covered the many categories that could come up but since this is an inaugural award ceremony you will forgive me for my few categories. You can also give me your suggestions. Please nominate your favorite politician.

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Rayhab Gachango

Rayhab Gachango

Potentash Founder. A creative writer. The Managing Editor at Potentash. Passionate about telling African stories and stories about the inclusion of minorities. Find me at hi@potentash.com. “We're all stories, in the end.” ― Steven Moffat

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