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Airing out dirty laundry in public

Rayhab Gachango by Rayhab Gachango
20 July 2012
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This is a reply to Dear Doris, letters written by Ian, her husband. If you want to get the letters here they are http://mydeardoris.wordpress.com/

Dear Ian.

I want to ask how you are but I have been reading your blog, frog, or whatever you call it and I am so mad I want to throw a shoe or two at you.  First of all I know I cheated on you twice but did you have to tell the whole bloody world?  You are telling my dirty secrets like we are on that busted show with Shiku. I thought you forgave me and let by-gones be by-gones.  Now I find you have told the whole world.

The only reason I cheated in the first instance was to get your attention.  But you kept ignoring me, flying around the world and leaving me at home alone to raise the children.  I know you provided financially.  But money couldn’t keep me warm at night or hold me.  I wanted someone to hold me that’s why I cheated.  I thought you would notice and things would change.  But you kept ignoring me.  You didn’t even find out until I cheated the second time when I shouted it when we were arguing. I was sorry the minute those words came out of my mouth.

The second time I cheated I wanted it to be obvious.  I wanted you to know that somebody still found me sexy and wanted to be with me.  It’s like you no longer saw me as a woman just as a mother to your kids.  I wanted you to desire me like you did when we first meet.  When you couldn’t get enough of my company.  What happened to us Ian?  You changed from the man that used to love me and want to be seen with me.  You would come home from your trips and refuse to take me to bed, claiming that you were tired.  I wondered if you were having an affair or affairs.

Ok I know it hurt you that I had an affair with your best friend.  Sam was always coming to check up on us.  He loved my cooking and he made me laugh.  Ian you were not here.  And I was so lonely with the kids off to university.  I wanted to feel like a woman again, a desired woman.  But Ian I was so foolish, not because you caught us in bed but because all I wanted was you.  I think I could plead temporary insanity with the affairs.

Now I seem to have lost you.  You seem to be more interested in writing to me letters that you don’t post or hand deliver to me.  Do you still love me Ian?  Do you? After finding your blog which everybody in this town seems to know about but me I wonder if you do?

I logged in to your website (is it a website?) and found some young girl had written you a letter.  I don’t even understand what she was saying and I had to get the nanny to translate the letter from that weird sheng language into English.  Seriously Ian you are now gallivanting around with a girl from Eastland’s who can’t write properly and who seems to be threatening any woman who stands in her way.

I don’t know what’s happening to you Ian.  Mara it’s the yellow yellow girls then some strange girls who seem to want to not break up with you.  I am wondering if our daughter in university could actually be reading what you write.  Does she know that her father is a sugar daddy?  I am so disappointed in you.  I didn’t think that you would go chasing young girls the age of your daughter.  But then again maybe I shouldn’t cast stones seeing as to how I am a fallen woman.

Ian I want you to know that I do love you.  I always have.  I know I broke your heart and I wish I could undo it.  I hurt you.  I hope you can forgive me and we can move on.  All I want is for us to be a family again.  For us to be a happy family.  I know that you did not marry me for the money as my father said but because you loved me.  So please come back.  I promise that I will change. I promise Ian that if you come back to me I will never look at another man again.

Love always Doris.

 

 

 

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Rayhab Gachango

Rayhab Gachango

Potentash Founder. A creative writer. The Managing Editor at Potentash. Passionate about telling African stories and stories about the inclusion of minorities. Find me at [email protected]. “We're all stories, in the end.” ― Steven Moffat

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