A Bad Relationship Can Ruin A Woman's Successful Career. Here's What You Should Be Looking Out For In A Life Partner

The saying goes, behind every great man is a great woman. But the same is also true for women. When selecting the man who you plan to spend the rest of your life with, it has to be someone who enables your success. Other qualities are important like compatibility with ethical values, a sense of humour, hardworking or getting along with your family and friends. But more importantly, you need to choose a life partner who will increase your rate of success rather than make you stagnate or bring you down.

You want to choose a partner who helps you grow and supports your personal development. But it needs to strike a delicate balance because your partner shouldn’t solely be your life coach or cheerleader. However, they should be the kind of person to whom support comes naturally to them.

When the honeymoon phase ends in a relationship and you begin to dig deeper in exploring how you’ll be together long-term, you need to consider how their beliefs will affect your future. And even then, do their actions match their values? And more specifically, will they help you succeed?

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It’s more common to see successful men with supportive wives and a family thriving in such a dynamic. But when the woman is the more successful one, it can create a lot of conflict and even make a woman fail to progress in her career to save her marriage. According to the University of Connecticut, men who depend on financially successful women are more likely to cheat.

This also comes from a patriarchal view where men think that the success of their wives is a failure on their part. They then become more resentful, egotistical, disrespectful, and even abusive sometimes. Vocal Media also found that women often abandon their ambitions to keep their husbands happy. This is because of patriarchal conditioning where women are taught to put marital bliss ahead of career goals.

Women have also left lucrative careers to be home carers which comes with its risks. Relying on a partner for your upkeep can be dangerous. If a spouse decides they no longer want to support you, they can easily leave you destitute. It’s also difficult to go back to work after a long hiatus to be a home carer because most industries don’t consider domestic work as valuable labour.

To avoid situations like these, women must look for specific qualities in their life partners. They must be people who contribute to their success rather than erase it. They must be people who understand that their wives can be extremely ambitious. And women can still be great partners and successful in their careers. Here are some things women should consider when choosing a life partner who increases their rate of success.

What women should look for in a life partner who contributes to their success

1. Have a mutually solid foundation

Your future husband needs to have his aspects of life that he can stand on while you focus on your own. Your future life partner should be responsible for their wellness and well-being. This doesn’t mean that they shouldn’t need support but they should be someone who knows when they need support and asks for it, rather than being co-dependent. They should also advocate strongly for your needs and be aware of their own. Your partner shouldn’t be resentful of how much you’re working for your goals, instead, they should have their own. A partner should enrich a relationship, not turn it into another job.

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2. Respect

When Aretha Franklin sang Respect, she told her man when he got home, all she wants is a little respect. And when she gives him all her money, she wants her profits. The same principle applies when it comes to respect between partners. Your future life partner should know your boundaries, limits, value, and worth. At no point should they diminish the efforts you put into your goals. They also shouldn’t interfere with them. When your future partner respects you, he asks about what you’re doing, what you need to do, and what success looks like for you. They care about what you’re doing and are there to cheer for you when you succeed and boost you when you fumble. They do not make you feel less than or resent you for having goals.

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3. Care

A partner who increases your success rate just cares. Whether it’s about their appearance, their environment, their fashion sense, or what they consume. They care. There is a consideration for everything they wear, eat, read, listen to, or watch. They aren’t easily influenced by alpha bro podcasts or their clueless friends. They have strong opinions, which they form after getting information from well-informed sources. When they don’t know something, they don’t pretend to know and simply ask more knowledgeable people to educate them.

4. Empathy

If you’re overrun with work and they find that your house is messy because you haven’t had a chance to clean up, they get to cleaning without having to be asked. They pay attention to details and do what’s needed to plug any energy leaks that are making achieving your goals more difficult. Relationships: Signs Your Relationship Lacks Emotional Support

5. Consistency

While many of the mentioned traits are only something you can witness after spending a lot of time together, there are some characteristics you can see early on. Consistent people don’t stop doing something once they’ve “landed” a partner. If they made a habit of buying you flowers every weekend, they keep doing it even after you become a couple. It doesn’t even have to be the act of buying you flowers. It’s the thoughtfulness of getting you something every weekend. If they stop buying flowers and start buying something more practical or even having a picnic surrounded by nature, that’s a partner who’s more likely to contribute to your success.

6. How they treat others

A life partner represents you even when you aren’t together. You are who you spend most of your time with. If your partner is rude to cleaners, servers, security guards, or other point-of-sale workers, they’re disrespectful. hey don’t respect any job and don’t realise how hard others work just to make a decent income. If they’re selective about who they’re decent to, they’ll eventually turn that bad attitude on you.

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7. Honesty

Some men want a stay-at-home wife they can dote on who takes care of their home. That shouldn’t be your problem if you’re an ambitious woman who cares more about her career. Understandably, some men can obfuscate such a desire and pretend to be ok with your success but will eventually tear you down. To avoid such men, it’s important to insist on honesty from the beginning. Here you can see if there’s an alignment of values. In addition, you can see how he responds to successful women and if he even has any successful female friends.

8. Equal contributions

To have a successful life, you need a partner who contributes. Women are still disproportionately saddled with child and home care. Even when they have careers, women have to care for their children and homes, sometimes without help even when they have a partner. This burden of extra care sometimes leads women to scale back on their careers or give up on their ambitions. To ensure success, you need a partner who actively contributes to housework. These partners need to be evolved enough to want to do housework. They also need not be the kinds of men who have to be praised for doing the bare minimum.

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9. Growth mindset

Someone with ambition inherently has a growth mindset. According to the Harvard Business Review, this is the thinking that you can improve through hard work, learning, and strategies. The opposite of this is the fixed mindset. This is the belief that talent is innate and they don’t put much effort into learning. A partner with a fixed mindset is more likely to engage in shortcuts, do the bare minimum, and become defensive when faced with criticism. They discourage you when they see you try to improve yourself.

10. Security

Men can be threatened by successful women. This is more visible when they date a woman who isn’t established but grows to become successful. A successful woman needs a man who isn’t threatened by her success. Women shouldn’t have to apologise for their success. Her partner should also not feel like he’s in competition with her. An insecure life partner sabotages their wife’s success with negative talk, discouragement, or guilt-tripping.