I had just finished my campus education and I felt cheated. I had come to campus expecting to have the social life I had heard so many people speak about. The crazy nights out where people found themselves sleeping in ditches or the random dating frenzy that most of my schoolmates had picked up. Four years had gone by without me indulging in any of these things. I rarely went out and I had dated the same guy since second year. Sad life if you ask me.
So I made up my mind. I was going to let loose and make all the bad decisions my mother had warned me about. I was convinced that I would regret it later in life if I failed to act now. So I dumped my ever so sweet boyfriend; told him that I needed to focus on myself for now. He didn’t quite get it but what choice did he have? I had made up my mind and that was that.
So for the next couple of months, I actively tried to live on the fast lane. I went out partying and stayed out late into the wee hours of the morning. Thank God I was living with my sister. God forbid my mother found out about my late night escapades. I even revamped my closet up a little bit to include a few revealing pieces. I had tossed aside my nun-like attire all in a bid to have a good time.
That’s when I met Antony-self-proclaimed bad boy. I had attended one of my friend’s birthdays in a popular club when I met him. He sounded overconfident and a little disrespectful – the kind of guy I would have previously ignored. This is however what I wanted. A taste of the dark side.
So I got to know Antony, despite the fact he had some undesirable traits. He rarely paid for dates and went for days without communicating with me. However much those things bothered me, I felt it necessary to finish what I started. Besides, he was not all bad, he made me laugh and always made me feel special when we hang out with his friends.
One of the traits that I struggled with was his smoking antics. He had tried to get me to smoke multiple times but I had turned down the offer. I did not understand why people did it. So when I went to visit his home one weekend, I was not shocked he offered me a weed cigarette.
My choice to decline his offer yet again caused us to have our first heated argument since we had started dating. He claimed that I had was not making an effort to try out the things he loved doing. He also claimed that he felt judged by me for smoking. After what seemed like an eternity of arguing, I finally caved in. I mean, what harm would one little weed cigarette do to me?
That was the beginning of a long spiral down a dangerous road. One cigarette turned into three and little by little I felt myself get consumed by the effects of the drug – ‘getting high ’so to speak. After about two hours of continuous laughter followed by periods of awkward laughter, I was starting to feel like myself again. He then suggested we take a walk to and fro the shopping centre.
As we were about to get out, Antony grabbed a few weed cigarettes and placed them in my pocket since he had worn a pair of pocketless sweatpants. I was not comfortable with the idea of walking around with an illegal product in my pants knowing that there was a police station right in the middle of the town centre. He, however, assured me that he would only smoke them as we walked back thus we wouldn’t get caught. I was still a little uneasy but seeing as we had just come from having an argument, I decided to hold my peace.
His promise held up until we were walking back from the shops. However, he started smoking before we had passed the police station. Just as I was about to start lecturing him, I saw a policeman standing right outside the police station gate staring at us. I pretended not to see him and quietly relayed the information to Antony. Before we knew it, the policemen had approached us and had demanded that we follow him into the police station. I was in a frenzy. The remaining weed cigarettes in my pocket made me pray that the ground would open up and swallow me.
Normally, being caught in possession of weed is not such a big deal. However, the policemen like to use it to their advantage and milk a few unlucky suspecting strangers- we were today’s unlucky bunch. Once we got in, they asked us to empty our pockets in which case I ended up looking like the guilty party. The policemen suggested that it would be okay to release Antony since he did not have any contraband on him. They were however not going to release me seeing as I had just produced three sticks of weed cigarettes.
As I waited for Antony to plead my case, he quickly rushed out of the police station without even uttering a word. I was in complete bewilderment. I mean how could he just leave me here? It was his fault I was in this situation in the first place. It slowly dawned on me that I was in no way going to get any help from Antony. I was on my own.
Luckily I was given a chance to make one call before they took my phone and locked me up. I was able to call my sister who angrily came and bailed me out. Antony had cost me 7000 shillings on weed that was not even mine. Not to mention that my sister was beyond furious with me. That was it. I had lived the life I had craved for or so long and I did not like it. I did not even bother to call Antony. I deleted his number and I was now ready to go back to my quiet life.
On the bright side, as much as I hated the experience, maybe I needed to go through it so that I could realize this life was not for me. I would stop romanticizing bad boys and go back to dating nice guys.
***Single lady in Nairobi is a collection of real-life stories and opinions from different women. It looks at the current world of dating in Kenya and the experiences that ladies have gone through. The views and opinions expressed here are those of the contributors and do not necessarily represent or reflect the views of Potentash.com